A Drink Back In Time

Perhaps there is nothing so whimsical as a day trip out to Todd Mission to check out the Texas Renaissance Festival (TRF). Good food, great entertainment, and fantastic people watching, the TRF has it all.

While it is family friendly there is always a rather tongue-in-cheek adult side to the TRF. I know in the three years I have attended I’ve seen some serious cleavage, chainmail bikinis, and giant cod pieces. Also, if you’ve ever gotten a chance to sit and listen to the verses of Arthur Greenleaf Holmes you know that there are definitely some child unfriendly aspects of the TRF.

Here is a sample for your appreciation:

Mother, will my stones drop

Ere I turn twenty-nine?

I tire of this empty sack

Against my hairless thigh.

So yeah, not for the ears of youth!

In that vein I’ve created an drinking game for the TRF based on my appreciation of all things turkey legs and bawdy. Click the link at the bottom to enjoy!

Audience: While the TRF is family friendly, this activity is definitely for those over 21

Price: TRF tickets are cheapest on their website or at Walgreens: $23.95 for adults, $11.95 for kids; kids get in free on Sunday

Parking: You can pay for premium parking closer to the gate or you can park in one of the designated lots. There are handy parking guides to show you to your spot.

Distance: The TRF is huge, at 55 acres it is supposedly the largest renaissance faire in the United States (everything is bigger in Texas, including the renaissance faires)

Time to Complete: Going to the TRF is an all day event feel free to incorporate this drinking game however you see fit

What to Bring:

• This drinking game

• Walking shoes (boots or sneakers, there will be mud)

• Sunscreen

• Cash (most vendors accept cards but there are a few left that are cash only)

• Download the TRF app to make your day easier

Important Note: Please do not drink and drive, always have a designated driver in your group. The TRF is a seasonal event in located an hour and half outside of Houston, it runs from October 8th to November 27th.

A Note on Traffic: Traffic in Magnolia is notoriously during TRF season. The quickest way to get to Todd Mission from Houston is actually the longest way. Take 45 north all the way to Conroe, turn west onto 105, take 105 to Plantersville, in Plantersville take 1774 south right into TRF. It seems like a long drive by there is NO TRAFFIC, so it’s totally worth the few extra miles.

Click Here to Drink Your Way Back to the 1500s